No BLTs and how about them screws?

It’s Saturday here in the ‘hood. That means it has been over a week since I’ve left the house to go anywhere (other than a short walk down the street). My grandeur plans of reading a million books while recovering was waylaid early on — mainly by my inability to concentrate or be seated in any comfortable fashion.

Photo by from Pexels

Today may be the first day, however, that feels closer to a more usual day. Sure, it’s a no BLT recovery (I can’t bend, lift, or twist) and have a most unpleasant brace (aka “the binder”) around my middle. But it is the first day that I am not counting down to a pain med or muscle relaxer.

After two nights of scorching sciatica this is feeling good — today. And I am only focused on the today. Tomorrow could be something else entirely. But I’m leaning toward the other side of drugged drowsiness at least. Anyone texting or emailing me probably got some gibberish at some point — it was hard.

I’m thinking about my tattoo and what that will look like with the incision glue finally all comes off — and what we may do to “re-purpose” what’s left. Feeling around back there, I expected to feel the screws, or at least see them peeking out atop the barbell. Alas, no. Now it’s just waiting on the spackle to dry — I mean the fusion to happen. It will, just really, really slowly; 6–12 months slowly.

It’s a lot of time. In a few weeks I’ll be “assigned” physical therapy of some sort. Meaning, I may or may not be a good candidate to go, as I can do and have done the exercises for years with and without oversight. I may also be beyond what PT can do for me in that instance. It depends — it’s the common answer among my series of questions asked.

Muscle memory is a grand thing. My legs and core have recognized their part in the no BLT and I’m reminded of Day 1 squats with my power lifting trainer who wouldn’t let me do any weight until the form was down. Getting up and sitting down is all about those squat moves. Getting out of bed, or changing position requires that core power strength to stay stable. Queue those planks, and even the push-up challenge of a few years back.

I know — it isn’t a 1:1 relationship in recovery to the above, but it is how I think about it. It’s the same with diet — fuel healing. The night I was tired and just wanted Fritos, my mom (who has been food prepping like a champion for me) reminded me that it wasn’t healing foods — and I think I had some salad or bean soup instead. It matters.

Recovery foods have been her amazing bean soup, roasted veggies, fruit — balanced with Impossible Nuggets and sugar cookies. She’s also prepped lasagnas, butternut squash mac & cheese with chickpea pasta, power burritos, and will be adding some lentil Bolognese and sweet potato lentil soup.

Hopefully, the weather breaks a little for a few outside walks, but I’ve racked up about 90 mins of just back and forth around the house. You do what you can.

Gratitude for today, for the support, for the funny memes, thoughtful texts, and emails. Flowers, food delivery, gift cards for food delivery; I am humbled.

Song of the day, All Dressed Up and No Place to Go, Willie Nile




Normal human in an extraordinaire world. Memoir / Humor / Just Life

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Nikki Barr

Nikki Barr

Normal human in an extraordinaire world. Memoir / Humor / Just Life

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